Suddenly the red light shone very brightly through the trees not far ahead. “Now it is the burglar’s turn,”[23] they said. “Bilbo, you must go and find out all about that light, and what it is for,” said Thorin to the hobbit. “Now go, and come back quickly, if all is well. If not, come back if you can! It you can’t, hoot twice like a barn-owl and once like a screech-owl, and we will do what we can.”

So Bilbo had to go off, before he could explain that he could not hoot even once like any kind of owl. But hobbits can move absolutely quietly in woods. And he came up to the fire without disturbing anyone. There he saw three very large trolls sitting round a very large fire. They were roasting mutton on long spits of wood. There was a barrel of good drink nearby, and they were drinking out of jugs.

“Mutton yesterday, mutton today, and mutton again tomorrow, Tom” said one of the trolls.

“Yes, Bert. We haven’t had a bit of manflesh[24] for ages,” said another troll. “Why did William bring us here?” he said. “Shut your mouth!” answered William, the troll, sitting next to them. Bilbo was standing in the shadows. He had heard that stealing things from the trolls’ pockets was really easy, so he crept behind a tree just behind William.

Bert and Tom went off to the barrel. William was having another drink. Then Bilbo put his little hand in William’s huge pocket. There was a purse in it. He lifted it carefully out. But suddenly the purse said, “Hey, who are you?” and William turned round at once and grabbed Bilbo by the neck.

“Bert, look what I’ve caught!” said William.

“What is it?” said the others coming up.

“I don’t know! Who are you?”

“Bilbo Baggins, a bur – a hobbit,” said poor Bilbo.

“A burrahobbit?” said they.

“What was a burrahobbit doing in my pocket?” said William.

“And can you cook them?” said Tom.

“You can try,” said Bert.

“But he is so small!” said William.

“Perhaps there are more like him nearby, and we can make a pie,” said Bert. “Are there any more of your sort in these woods?” said he looking at Bilbo.

“Yes, lots,” said Bilbo, before he remembered not to give his friends away. “No, none at all, not one,” he said at once.

“What do you mean?” said Bert.

“Please don’t cook me, kind sirs! I am a good cook myself. I’ll cook beautifully for you, a perfectly beautiful breakfast for you, if only you won’t have me for supper.”

“Poor little thing![25] Let him go!” said William.

“But first let him explain ‘lots and none at all’,” said Tom. “I don’t want anyone cut my throat in my sleep. Hold his toes in the fire, till he talks!”

“No!” said William. “I caught him anyway.”

“You’re a fat fool, William,” said Bert, and the trolls started fighting.

Right in the middle of the fight Balin came up. The dwarves had heard noises from a distance, and after waiting for some time, they started to creep towards the light as quietly as they could. But as soon as Tom saw Balin, he gave an awful cry. Trolls simply hate dwarves (uncooked). Bert and Bill stopped fighting at once, and quickly put a sack over Balin’s head.

Soon other dwarves appeared and all of them got into sacks. Bilbo was lying under a bush, not moving.

Just then Gandalf came back. But no one saw him. The trolls had just decided to roast the dwarves now and eat them later.

“That’s not a good idea,” said a voice. Bert thought it was William’s.

“Don’t start the argument, Bill,” he said, “or it will take all night.”

“Who’s a-arguing?” said William, who thought it was Bert that had spoken.

“You are,” said Bert.

“You’re a liar,” said William; and so the argument started. Soon the trolls started fighting.