Ignat, who was sitting opposite, sipped his latte with habitual calmness and a funny grin and gloated: – Come

on, admit it, were you waiting for me to ask? Six months have passed, and it's time for the annual report on your drunken adventures.

"Annual?" Ignat, to be honest, it's more like a monthly disaster. I grimaced, remembering the events of six months ago. —Okay, okay. Just promise me you won't take this on camera. The last time you did that, my social media was on fire for weeks. And my boss was just furious.

Ignat raised his hands in a conciliatory gesture. —

Honest pioneer. No videos. Just an oral recitation of your sins. It's just a pity that I forgot my cassock," he laughed.

I sighed. – In general, do you remember that startup for creating VR games that I was trying to promote?

Ignat nodded. – The one where you promised mountains of gold and a breakthrough in the industry, but in the end it all

ended with you playing a "Virtual Bruiser" with yourself?

– Yes, that's the one. So, after a disastrous speech to investors, I decided to drown my grief in the good old bar

"The Lame Unicorn".

Ignat smiled sarcastically. – How "unpredictable".

"I know, I know. But there's a catch. Unfortunately, the bar found itself in a zone of turbulence due to a new trend – alcohol yoga. Yes, that's what you're thinking. Yoga and alcohol.

I paused to enjoy the look on his face, which was puzzled, and he was just trying not to laugh in my face. – And, as you can guess, my attempt to keep my balance in the

lotus position after three shots of tequila ended badly. I ran right into a group of novice yogis, disrupting their meditation and breaking a couple of candles. "It's a masterpiece,– Ignat commented.

– That's not all. After that, I decided that I needed enlightenment. And the fastest way to get there is, of course, to participate in a local stand-up comedian contest. You know, I've always dreamed of sharing my humor with the world.

–Oh no, not stand—up," Ignat groaned, shaking his head.

"You're telling jokes at the Flatlander level."

– Well, how to say it. After a few mugs of "fire dragon" (a local cocktail made from a hellish mixture of everything that burns) My jokes have become even more…

experimental. So experimental that the audience fell silent, and then tomatoes flew at me. Real, juicy

tomatoes, or so it seemed to me. At least, I hope so.

I rubbed my face. – And to top it all off, I decided that the stage is a great place to showcase my parkour skills. You know, jumping over tables, doing somersaults.…

Ignat burst out laughing. – Is parkour in your performance? It must have been epic and, as always, unpredictable.

– Epic failure! I broke my finger when I got caught on a microphone stand, and ended the evening at the nearest

trauma center, where I tried to convince the doctor that I was a superhero and broke my finger saving the world.

"And the doctor believed you?" Ignat asked.

"He prescribed me a sedative and told me not to drink fire dragon anymore," I replied. – The funny thing is that the

next day I woke up, and my story had already gone viral on TikTok. Now I am known as a "Yoga Parkour Comedian", and I was offered to star in a social advertisement against alcohol.

I sighed, finishing my coffee. – That's it, Ignat. I'm trying to live a normal life, but apparently fate has prepared me for the role of a city lunatic.

Ignat smiled. – Well, what can I say? You make my life more interesting. But next time, maybe we can just try to sit at home and play chess?

I looked at him suspiciously. – Well, if it's ordinary chess, which will have real pieces, and not B-52?