As a doctor, I am well aware of the psychosomatic mechanisms of disease development and the fatal changes in the body triggered by the emotional sphere. I imagined it this way: no auto-aggression → no diseases → a person can live until they get bored. I thought it was foolish to ruin myself with my own hands and wondered why all those who lived before me got sick and died so early. There was a certain amount of irony in this, but I genuinely believed that by overcoming the mechanism of self-destruction, a person could live happily ever after.

The only thing that puzzled me was that few people seemed to achieve this. Around this time, a friend told me about the apparent auto-aggression in a small child who, due to their age and autism, did not understand much. It became clear that the issue was much more complex than I had thought. The mechanism of auto-aggression is likely embedded in the foundations of the human personality, making it impossible to suppress entirely. It is probably something that will eventually lead to the grave of everyone born, much sooner than we would like. But why?

Trying to answer this question marked the beginning of my fascinating journey into the world of the infantile personality, the world of Ouroboros.

In this work, I describe my view on the patterns of behavior and psychological reactions formed in early childhood that hinder psychological maturation. The infantile personality is characterized by devaluation, auto-aggression, and a constant oscillation between superiority and vulnerability. Additionally, the entire psyche is permeated with illusions about oneself and the world. Such a person is rarely satisfied with life, almost never develops healthy relationships with others, and seldom has a successful career. Even if there is family and career growth, he is still always dissatisfied with the result.

From a metaphysical point of view, we can imagine that the Serpent, who led the forebears of mankind to the Expulsion, incorporated his structure into the psyche of all their descendants to deprive them of the joy of being and, ultimately, to lead them to death through self-destruction. I imagined this structure in the form of Ouroboros, who symbolically eats himself, and the closed vicious circle of pathological reactions came to life in the form of this ancient symbol. Therefore, in the further narration, there will be many references to Ouroboros. Sometimes, I will correlate the described patterns with the hunger of this creature and the volume it occupies in the psyche.

I have based my work not on the theory of evolution, which posits that humans descended from apes, but on the Biblical story of Paradise Lost. First, a bit of ancient factology, and then a flight of fancy.

Let's introduce the first humans, Adam and Eve. God created Adam from clay and breathed life into him. A little later, Eve was created from Adam's rib, and they began to live in Paradise, which was called Eden. They were provided with everything they needed, were satisfied with everything, and were not worried about anything. They seemed perfect to themselves and to each other. All in all, they were happy.

In that Garden of Eden there were many trees, including two forbidden trees: «In the fertile land, the Lord God grew every beautiful tree with edible fruit, and also he grew the tree of life in the middle of the garden and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil». Gen 2:9.

God warned Adam that eating of the fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil leads to death: