But this does not cancel thoughts on Chernyshevsky: «What to do?» Restrict local success or step on the slippery slope of the struggle for justice? Stepping on her, I should be aware, that I will have to work as a scout behind enemy lines: only aliens are around. And my next step may be the last. But «you cannot shoot all»! This audience grows like toadstools: it is not necessary to cultivate. Maybe you should not burden yourself with routine tasks, even more so with taking higher obligations? Wouldn’t it be better to limit oneself to work «according to the situation», when there will be no patience, no other way out, except for going out to the business and to the client? I’m not a «conscious fighter for the cause of the revolution»: I’m just a partial person…

I click the knife button. No, I’m not «at work» yet. I am just inspecting the weapon… And once again «no»: not crimes, but retaliation. And this is not a question of terminology. This is a fundamental difference. And I look around not to say goodbye to it. You have to be the last fool: this is not a knife, but a work of art, piece work. As they say in places «not so remote» (simply – far): «First grade!» And, if, really, not in my pocket, then he has a place – in the museum! And not in the museum of the history of the Ministry of Internal Affairs, and in the Armory!

I got it on occasion, got even before me finally «got it». I brought it from the army, from the harsh places, that «at the very edge of the earth». By the way, that’s very convenient: look for the ends… on the edge! How did this happen? Elementary: if Shura Balaganov happened sit in the prison along with a source of information about millions of Koreiko, I happened to be in the hospital with one goner, neither the name nor the face of which I do not remember. And not «already», but «immediately, as soon as». As soon as I went out of the gate of the institution: «out of sight, out of mind». That’s very convenient also: how to remember something, that did not have time to remember? I myself always try to «sink into the soul as deeply»: mutual short memory is pledge of mutual longevity.

The reasons, why I liked him, I do not know. But I just liked. In the soldiers’ hospital is boring. When there is no vodka, no cards, no women, the time is turned on exclusively by talking. And I was the master to talk! Also, what a master! I could talk «certified silent» himself! But this goner and did not have to talk: he himself was asking, maybe, because not long left for him to live. As the team informed me, the comrade with might and main was preparing to meet the «woman in white shroud», and not only with might and main in all-armed.

So in one of our conversations, I don’t remember already, an illustration of what, this knife appeared. The knife was worked by a craftsman-dad, who at the same time was listed as a recidivist. The design was simple and effective in Russian. The main thing, the device did not fail: checked «on the stand». I do not remember how and why, but I became the owner of this souvenir, which is not a souvenir at all. But I remember exactly, that when I gain the rights of violence to a comrade did not apply. Most likely, there was a mutually beneficial exchange: my good participation – for a part of his goodness.

Soon I left the hospital «as prescribed» – together with a gift. Before departure, I, as a decent person, went to say goodbye – and «said goodbye»: a comrade «ordered us all to live for a long time» the other day. I will not say, that I was too upset by this news. I will say more: it did not upset me at all. After all, the guy «gave the ends not only into the ground, but also «into the water». It is a sin to say so, but a very correct decision. Now let someone try to find it! All at once: his, me, our relationship, the knife, the manufacturer! And if so, then there was nothing: neither me – in connection with him, nor him – in connection with me! There was no other «according to the inventory»! I was free «on all four sides»: none of them had tattoos on me! And the «apparatus» is his spiritual testament to us all… in my face!..