He has won all hearts by his sweetness and gentleness. I have no doubt he will in a few weeks recover completely. There are, I pray God and St. Joseph and Ste. Mary, many, many, happy years for you both.

19 August. – Strange and sudden change in Renfield last night. About eight o’clock he began to get excited and sniff about[107] as a dog does. The attendant encouraged him to talk. Renfield is usually respectful to the attendant; but tonight, the man tells me, he was quite haughty. All he said was, “I don’t want to talk to you: you are nothing for me now; I have my Master.”

The attendant thinks some sudden form of religious mania has seized him. If so, he might be dangerous. At nine o’clock I visited him myself. His attitude to me was the same as that to the attendant. It looks like religious mania, and he will soon think that he himself is God.

For half an hour or more Renfield was getting excited more and more. All at once he became quite quiet, and sat on the edge of his bed, and looked into space. I tried to lead him to talk of his pets. At first he made no reply, but after he said testily, “I don’t care about them.”

“What?” I said. “You don’t care about spiders?” (Spiders at present are his hobby.)

To this he answered enigmatically, “I don’t need them anymore.”

He did not explain himself, but remained obstinately seated on his bed all the time I remained with him.

Later. – The night watchman[108] came to me and said that Renfield had escaped. I threw on my clothes and ran down at once; my patient is a very dangerous person. He was only in his night-gear,[109] and cannot go far.

The attendant told me that the patient had gone to the left, and had taken a straight line, so I ran as quickly as I could. Soon I saw a white figure. I ran back at once, told the watchman to get three or four men immediately and follow me, in case our friend might be dangerous. I could see Renfield’s figure just behind the angle of the deserted house, so I ran after him. He was talking to some one. After a few minutes, however, I could see that he did not see anything around him. I heard his words, “I am here to do Your bidding, Master. I am Your slave, and You will reward me, for I shall be faithful. I have worshipped You long. Now that You are near, I await Your commands!”

When we were trying to catch him he fought like a tiger. He is immensely strong, for he was more like a wild beast than a man. I never saw a lunatic in such a paroxysm of rage before; and I hope I shall not again. His cries are at times awful, but the silences that follow are even more terrible. He spoke like this, “I shall be patient, Master. It is coming – coming – coming!”

I was too excited to sleep, but this diary has quieted me, and I feel I shall get some sleep tonight.

24 August, Buda-Pesth.

My dearest Lucy,

I caught the boat to Hamburg, and then the train on here. I found my poor Jonathan, oh, so thin and pale and weak-looking! He is only a wreck of himself, and he does not remember anything that has happened to him for a long time past. He has had some terrible shock. Sister Agatha is a sweet, good soul.

I am now sitting by his bedside, where I can see his face while he sleeps. He is waking!…

When he woke he asked me for his coat, as he wanted to get something from the pocket; I asked Sister Agatha, and she brought all his things. I saw that amongst them was his note-book, and was going to ask him to let me look at it. I knew that I might find some clue to his trouble. But he sent me over to the window, and said he wanted to be quite alone for a moment. Then he called me back, and when I came he put his hand over the note-book, and he said to me very solemnly, “Wilhelmina, you know, dear: there must be no secret, no concealment between husband and wife. I have had a great shock, and I do not know if it was all real or the dreaming of a madman. You know I have had brain fever. The secret is here, and I do not want to know it. I want to marry you as soon as possible, right here. Wilhelmina, here is the book. Take it and keep it, read it if you want, but never let me know.” He fell back exhausted, and I put the book under his pillow, and kissed him. I have asked Sister Agatha to let our wedding be this afternoon, and I am waiting for her reply…